The Middle Finger
On the way back from eating sushi, Mitzi and I were having a little discussion why we used the F-YOU Finger. After a few giggles…our little minds started to ponder how the Middle Finger came about. Most of us know what it means and the many ways it can be used, but we want to know its origins.
Here is the most common origin:
A popular urban legend states that during the Hundred Years’ War, the French would cut off the middle fingers of captured English archers so they would be unable to use their bows, and that after the Battle of Agincourt, the victorious English showed the French that their middle fingers were still intact. This legend is more commonly said of the V sign. They would also say “Pluck Yew” when presenting the Middle Finger.
My main use:
I tend to use my F-YOU Finger a lot when I’m stuck in shit traffic. Everyone knows how traffic jams can ruin a persons day, but Bad Drivers can really piss you off. Good drivers can cut you off and maintain faster speeds, but all I get is that “ass-hole” who cuts you off and then slows down. That pisses me off! When that occurs…I will put my hand on the dash, stick my long ass MIDDEL Finger up, honk my horn so they look into their rearview mirror, repeat “Fuck You!” several times (I know you could read lips), and ride their ass. I know it sounds like a bit of road rage, but it’s liberating to me. At least I’m not running anyone off the road and beating the living snot out of them.
- Shai
From my Best Friend Derrick:
I told Floyd that it was necessary to write this while I was at work. I had to get into character, and was unable to fully delve into the emotions involved without having direct influence of my subject.
30 minutes into my work day and I’m already screwing around writing my middle finger memoirs.
My subject of ire happens to be my boss. I give him all sorts of middle fingers.
- Monkey fingers: this is when I’m typing an email to him and I include .!.. ..!. He seems to think that I’m excited to run the report he is asking for. The reality is he is getting the texting finger.
- Silent finger: mental scalding or virtual fingers is when you picture in your head giving the finger. Mostly used in meetings or face to face office encounters.
- Full fledged: I’m only able to do this when his door is closed or behind his back.
I’m normally not a chicken shit about extending my hand and flipping the bird, but in today’s economy I can’t afford to lose my job. No matter how crappy it may be.
My boss will probably never read this, but if he does find it…… .!.. ..!. Fuck you dick weed.
-D
There will be more to come.
